September 28, 2012

sytycd

Here are my last 4 favs from old seasons...


love love love.


This is one of the first dances I ever watched on the show and it kind of hooked me.


I wish I could be a hip hop dancer.


This is a beautiful dance about breast cancer.

September 17, 2012

Baby Girl Robinson

We are so excited!!  We have some great news... we get to welcome baby girl Robinson in February!
I honestly don't even know where to begin, but we feel so blessed!

Here are a few little things that I/we have been feeling throughout this journey.  These are a lot of words.
Feel free to not read everything if it's too much.

First Trimester:

"Tonight we found out we are pregnant!!!!...probably.  At least that’s what the pregnancy test said. Did I mention that I took a pregnancy test about 2 months ago just for the heck of it just to see?? It came back negative. 
Anyway, I had an extra pregnancy test still under the sink and Luke said I should do it to see. So, I did.  I stood in the bathroom and started seeing the results immediately.  The results started showing fast so I called Luke into the bathroom. He was so skeptical.  It was funny, except not- because here I was thinking “Oh My Gosh This Is Real” and almost having this really emotional moment- but Luke is just standing there and tells me not to get my hopes up because the pregnancy test could be false.  True Luke, true. I got moody after that and that is basically how the rest of the night played out." 
 (1st positive pregnancy test)
(Of course I had to get a pic of the 2 of us that night)
 "Needless to say, the next day I had him bring home 4 pregnancy tests just so we could test it again and be EXTRA sure.  All 4 were positive and that next day he acted more excited. 

I already assume the baby is a girl.  It’s weird because I never thought I’d do that and I kind of don’t like that I do that, but hey, it is what it is. Luke assumes it too I think even though he will purposely refer to the baby as a boy just to be different than me. 

Thinking about babies…
I want an entire library of children’s books.  If I did a baby registry, I would have tons of books listed!  Today I went to Barnes and Nobles to pick up books to send to our parents in order to announce the pregnancy and was filled with childhood memories. I wanted to sit down and read every single one."  
(The beloved extra 4 pregnancy tests, just to be extra sure!)
"Last night I threw up for the first time in years. Seriously people, YEARS!  I’m pretty sure that I was younger than 10 the last time I threw up, plus I hardly ever get sick so I totally thought that I’d be above this whole morning sickness stuff.  Wrong. Very wrong." 


"A week from Tuesday I have my first appointment with a nurse midwife.  All I want is to hear them say that my baby has a heartbeat.  And then of course I can’t wait to know what the gender of our baby is so that I can start crafting away and planning nursery decorations, etc.  Honestly this will be so fun. 

I am a little overwhelmed at the idea of being a mother.  There is so much I want to become and in so many ways I thought I’d have so much of it down by now…but, I don’t.  At least I know that’s normal, but still. 

February is going to come so quickly.  I am honestly so excited. I know that I keep repeating myself but I can’t help it!"



"A few things…
Every day since Thursday I’ve been throwing up every other morning. Fun, I know.  Ha ha, I am so used to it now that yesterday when I threw up in the Shopko parking lot I didn’t even think much of it.  I was all about getting it over with and moving on. And yes, I said the Shopko parking lot.  On my way to work I totally had to throw up.  So much went through my mind. 
If I throw up in the car should I throw up on me, the steering wheel, the carpet?  I could quick empty out my purse and throw up in there. But wait, if I throw up while driving I’ll probably crash.  Oh, I am on I-215 and there is nowhere to pull over. Concentrate really hard on breathing and keeping everything down.  There’s my exit.  This is the LONGEST light of my life.  I think I can probably make it to work. It’s just down the road and I can rush into the bathroom.  Umm, nope can’t make to work.  Keep breathing!  Go straight at the light and find an empty spot in the parking lot where hopefully no one will see you…..
And that’s how it happened my friends.  And barely in time!  And then I continued on to work and all was well."

"I had my 10-week appointment (first appointment) and Luke was amazing and met me there. I am so glad he was willing to come and is willing to come to other appointments.  Well, not only that he is willing, but also that he is excited!  I love going through this process together." 


(Waiting for the nurse at our first appt)
"The nurse was asking me all sorts of questions, one of which was “Are you safe?”  I said yes and looking at Luke, she said, “Good, because if not, I’d have to punch him.”  We laughed and Luke responded with, “Actually you should be asking me if I feel safe.”  Oh ba ha Luke, what are you saying? That I’m a crazy person? Because you may be right." :)



"The nurse had me get up on the table and told me that if I was 10 weeks along then we should be able to hear the baby’s heartbeat.  Cute Luke stayed where he was and discretely video taped even though the nurse probably wouldn’t have cared.  After telling me not to wear something so high next time (I had on a high-waisted skirt), she got right to work with listening to the insides of my belly.  I had no clue what I should be listening for.  I just laid there and every now and then she would say, “That’s you.”  I kept thinking that I wouldn’t have even known otherwise, everything just sounded blended together for me.  Then she said, “Our baby’s heartbeat will be fast.”  I’m really glad she said that because I had no clue what kind of a heartbeat I would be listening for and I probably would have freaked out to hear such a fast heartbeat.  Finally, after I had seriously mentally prepared myself for her to tell me there might be no baby, she lifted up the monitor thing and I knew we had something.  Sure enough, there was a thump, thump, thump of a heartbeat.  We even got a little on video before Luke turned it off, although it’s super hard to catch.  Honestly, it was the most precious little heartbeat I have ever heard. I couldn’t believe it.  Something so tiny inside of me has a heartbeat and it’s my job to take care of it.  All this time I’ve known I was pregnant, but there are no signs like, belly getting bigger, or feeling the baby kick yet.  My only signs have been my morning sickness.  So, to finally hear a real heartbeat was such an amazing thing.  Afterwards when I got in my car I let it all sink in and I just felt so grateful to have had that experience and so grateful to have a little baby.  Honestly, I can’t imagine anyone aborting a baby.  That little baby is definitely a living thing with a heartbeat."

2nd Trimester:
"...I am grateful for other things too.  Like, this little baby in my tummy.  I heard that sweet little heartbeat again yesterday.  The nurse said, “We heard it and it sounded fabulous.”  I couldn’t agree more.
I’m grateful for my sweet husband.  He’s making the effort to attend all doctor appointments with me and I’m just obsessed with him.  On the 9th I had my first crazy pregnancy meltdown (at least I’ll blame it on the pregnancy).  It had to do with a fly in the room that had buzzed a little too much and wouldn’t leave and a spider that I found on my PJ shirt after I put it on.  It was the type of meltdown where I couldn’t catch my breath (talk about crazy). He just held me, and I fell asleep.  I love him more each day."

(video taken at my 14 week appt. Baby's heartbeat)

"I’m grateful for my boss at RISE.  I was anxious about telling him about being pregnant only because I didn’t want him to feel like I had just taken on this new position only to get pregnant and leave.  I told him my plan for after I have the baby and wanted him to know that if anything changed he would be the first to know and that I would always be up front with him about my plans to work or not work.  I don’t want to be the person that says they will come back full time, only to take maternity leave and decide to never come back.  So, whatever ends up happening, I just want to make sure he knows my plan and isn’t left wondering about what will happen with my position because I don’t think that is professional or fair to him.  I always knew he was a family guy, but I was so, so pleased and grateful for him to respond by saying that my kids should always, always come first and that he totally supports me with whatever I choose to do.  He followed it up with telling me how special a baby is, especially if it’s your first and that after I have the baby I probably won’t want to come back to work anyway.  It just put all of my anxiety at ease and made me so grateful to not work in an environment where my boss is going to be grumpy and negative about women in the workplace having kids.  For the record- I would love to stay home with the baby, but Luke and I will have to see where we are at with employment when that time comes. In the meantime, I’m grateful that I have a stable job that can support us and that Luke’s schedule is flexible.  We are so lucky."

"Between this appointment and my last appointment the nurse said some pretty funny things that make me love her:
-I asked about sushi, just to double check that it was alright for me to eat it as long as the fish were cooked.  She said, “Yes, but it would probably be just fine to eat the raw fish every now and then.  The Japanese do it all the time!”  She was so funny about it, but dead serious.  Thank you nurse for being so liberal about these things. Although I still am not going to eat raw fish during my pregnancy, just to be safe, it still makes me feel better. 
-“So, how are you doing with taking your prenatal vitamin?”  Me: “Uh, not so good.”  Her: “Meh, don’t worry about it, I’d much rather have you eating right.”  So, so true.  I still feel guilty about not taking my vitamin religiously, but again, she made me feel better."

"About 2 weeks ago I finally got the belly bump!  I was actually so excited when it happened. It was just one Sunday that I thought, “hmm, I’m pretty sure this looks more prego than not.”  And from then on, the belly has just kept on growing.  It was exciting because that in-between stage is hard.  It’s the stage of…”Is she pregnant or just gaining weight…I can’t really tell.”  And no one will say anything to you because they are too afraid to ask.  But now I have people asking me if I’m pregnant and for some reason I just love it. I think I love the fact that it’s visible and not something that I’m trying to hide.  Want to know something weird though? My belly button is getting bigger.  It’s not poking out or anything, but since my belly is stretching, that little dime of a belly button is now looking like a penny and will probably grow into a quarter. It’s weird. It doesn’t hurt, but I think in the back of my mind that I’m a little afraid it will rip open.
About 2 weeks ago I also started feeling little movements from this baby.  I’m not sure quite how to describe it.  It will be when I’m sitting or laying down.  I picture it like a stone rising to the surface of my belly.  All of the sudden I will just feel something rise or roll to the top and I can feel it.  It’s like a hard stone.  And then it will go away, and then it will come back.  Once or twice I have felt a little jab.  Those movements are not strong enough to be felt by someone who might put their hand on my belly to feel them, but I can feel them on the inside.  It’s crazy and fun all at the same time!"
(1st baby bump pic at about 16 weeks)

"As you know, I’ve wanted a girl this whole time.  Not only have I wanted a girl, but I’ve been picturing the baby as a girl this entire pregnancy.  However, about a week ago I started really wanting a little boy and picturing the baby as a boy.  It’s so funny thinking about it!  We find out in a week and a half!  The date has changed from the 18th to the 17th.  Whatever this little baby ends up being, we will be SO excited! 
As I’ve been thinking about the gender of the baby, I am vey excited, but the anxiety has started to set in.  Once we find out the gender of this little baby, I really think that everything will become even more realistic and the responsibility of taking care of an actual human being is really overwhelming.  As I’ve continued to think about this, the idea of having a little girl REALLY overwhelms me.  The thought of raising a child in general is a really humbling thought for me right now…but a girl? How do you do that?  Like I said, it’s a very humbling thought and a lot of responsibility.  I remain extremely excited and grateful.  We are SO lucky!  It’s just so much to think about. It’s a good thing we have good examples who have done this before us.
I am so grateful that Luke and I were able to start our little family 2 years ago.  I know that we are meant to have families and raise children.  Although everything is new to me and I’m not exactly sure how everything will work out and what obstacles we will face, this all feels so good."

19 weeks:
Monday, September 17, 2012
"The ultrasound appointment today was AMAZING.  I was almost startled when I saw that little baby on the screen.  I couldn't believe it! Everything is so real now. The cute little baby was all curled up, hands and legs tucked in.  Looked pretty comfy if you ask me.  We went over everything...the baby has a complete spine, the heart was beating and we saw all 4 chambers, the tummy was full, we looked at the brain, etc. etc.  I saw 2 little hands and 2 little feet. Technology is amazing.  It took a while for our baby to open it's little legs, but she finally did and voila...it's a girl!  
And from then on she was no longer referred to as "baby" and "it", but instead, "she" and "her".  This is so fun, SO fun! We are thrilled.  
It was amazing to watch her on the screen, to see her make tons of movements and realize how active she really is, but how much I just can't feel yet.  It was fun to have our eyes glued to the screen, to see Luke fascinated by it all as well. 
Today I am once again grateful for Luke and that he would be at the appointment with me.  I feel sad for people who go through pregnancy alone.  We are so lucky, excited, and blessed!"

Beautiful baby GIRL!

Pink drinks from Sonic to celebrate!









September 11, 2012

9.11

In January Luke and I had the opportunity to go to Ground Zero.  It was sobering to think of the streets being covered with debris, rubble, dust, and even bodies all those years ago.  I can't imagine what it must have been like to be in New York on that day.

Here we are. Behind us is ground zero.  Unfortunately there was still a lot of construction going on, so I'd still love to go back and see everything now.

Here is the Freedom Tower...still under construction. I love seeing the pictures of it now.





We went into the 9/11 exhibit (we couldn't get into the museum).  The pictures above are some from the exhibit.  I wish I had taken more. I learned so many things from being there and reading the timeline of events of that day.  I especially loved reading the personal story of a police officer whose personal items were on display.  
9.11 was a day I'll never forget.


September 6, 2012

Top of Utah

I got to cheer on runners in the Top of Utah half marathon and spend the weekend with lots of family and friends!

Honestly...this was such a great experience for me as just a cheerleader! I love races, and even standing on the sidelines I could feel an adrenalin rush, especially when I saw the people I was there specifically to cheer on!

Here are some lovely photos of the event...

Do you guys see why I love Logan so much??


 It's Luke! Here he is around mile 10. So glad I had the chance to see him!  I was seriously so proud!
On a side note, Braden had passed this spot about 20 minutes earlier. I couldn't believe it. Braden had never ran a half and he also didn't train. I was so surprised when I saw him, all I could do was jump up and down and cheer...so, no pictures of the beast (he wasn't feeling like a beast afterwards though :) ).
 Mom around mile 10, right there with Luke.  It was the best feeling in the world to cheer them on! I love how happy she looks.  Like it's easy or something right?
 Braden was too fast for us and made it to the finish line before we could get there. We were bummed! But we RAN to the finish line just to catch him, but no luck. Here he is with his fiance Remington.
 Luke crossing the finish line!!!  This was Luke's first half as well.  He did such a great job!!
 And mom right behind!
Shea and my aunt ran it too!  I loved cheering them on as well!! This is right before the finish line.  
 After-race pics...
Mom and Luke

Amy was so great and grabbed poster board and markers!

 Kelli and me.
Dana and Shea
 The finishers!!
 And the whole gang :)
Now for a few funnies-
It was so fun having mom around for the weekend.  This picture is funny to me because she drives closer to the steering wheel than I do!
 Oh and then yes, this.  What to say?  This is the night before the race. I was brushing my teeth and I could suddenly sense someone behind me.  Well this is what it was. Dork alert!
 After the race, Braden was using the bathroom so Mom and Luke started shaking the porta potty he was in.  You probably had to be there, but it was so funny!

I found this quote the other night while I was cleaning my room (finally).

"Believe in your training.  If you don't believe in what you're doing you'll never get anywhere.  It does you no good as an athlete to second-guess your work."
-Mario Fraioli

I really love this and after being at the race and reading that I wanted to start training hard core.  I was motivated.  I'll give it a little bit more time though.

Thanks for a great weekend everyone!

sytycd

So You Think You Can Dance....
I can't wait to share all my favorite dances from this season! Ah, I love this show!

But, in the meantime, here are some oldies but goodies that will always remain my fav.

This just makes me laugh. I'm pretty sure one day I'll try and learn the dance for fun.


This one I just love...


And then this...
Part of the reason I think I love this one so much is because it's to Total Eclipse of the Heart and I have a weird obsession with that song. I used to sing it over and over in my room back in the day.